When I first moved to Colorado I had only planned on staying for a couple of years. But I remember leaving California and hoping it would be more than a couple of years before my return. I was hoping I could finally stay in one place for longer than a year or two. I was really ready for a change. I had no idea what to expect. I arrived in Denver with Copper and whatever I owned that I could fit into my car.
It’s been 6+ years since that day. I absolutely love it here and I consider it my home. I know it’s a foreign concept to many, especially for those who have a large family, but I honestly thrive on my own. I enjoy having my own life, I enjoy not having drama and when you have a large family drama is always going to exist. I miss many of my family members on a daily basis but because I’ve become so accustomed to living so far away I’ve grown apart from many of them and other things have taken importance like my church, some friends and my Colorado lifestyle.
Recently, before I accepted this travel position that I will explain more about in a minute, I was talking to a friend of mine about feeling like a failure for going back to California. I thoroughly enjoy my life here, I like the feeling of thriving on my own and the last thing I want is to move closer to family and become dependent on being closer to family. I want to be able to go and do as I please, when I please, without second guessing myself or needing anyone. I don’t want to go back to California and stay in California because it’s easy. I have been living on my own, away from CA, for 9 out of the past 10 years. This probably makes me really selfish. And if that’s the case, then sure, call me selfish.
I want to go to California to spend the holidays closer to my family but still have my own life, to get a break from Colorado and all of the Andrew-is-everywhere feelings that I have, to make a lot of money in a short amount of time, to escape the cold days and to get a breath of fresh air that isn’t the Colorado mountains. I want a challenge, a change and the security that comes with becoming completely financially independent.
Over the course of 7 days I filled out an interested-in-traveling form online, spoke with a recruiter, applied for a travel RN position in California, interviewed on the phone and accepted a traveling position. Yesterday I resigned from my job here and was assured my boss would create another position for me if (and when) I decide to return to Colorado. Today I signed my traveling agreement and barring any hiccups in the entire process, I will start my traveling gig on 11/23. If the process takes longer I’ll start just after Thanksgiving on 11/30. My contract is 13 weeks with the option to extend if they like me (I hope they do!) or I can begin the search for a new travel position somewhere else in California or anywhere else in the US, head back to Colorado as a traveler, or head back to Colorado and go back to my job.
This past week has been so crazy emotionally that I haven’t really had time to breathe and take it all in. I have decided to keep my apartment here in Colorado and sublet it out so that if (& when) I want to come back, it will be here. And also because it’s so much easier than breaking my lease and figuring out how to get all of my stuff moved out in just a week. As for where I’ll live in California… that’s still up in the air. But I want to live within 25 miles of San Ramon, where the hospital is located. I have a few leads so hopefully in the next week something will work itself out. Right now, I’m tentatively planning on leaving Colorado next Thursday the 19th. Just me, as much as of my stuff that I can fit in my car, and my dogs.
I have one week left here. Here’s to a challenge, a change, warmer weather and the beautiful pacific coast.